I love working out and staying active and have tried many
forms of exercise. Out of all of them,
the one I hate the most is yoga.
- I’m always wobbling: I would not say I am uncoordinated or lack balance, but in certain poses, I all but fall on the ground
- I’m a slow learner: I never get the poses quite right. Either my knees are bent when it should be straight or I’m stretching the wrong muscle. And getting better at it is a very slow progression that I just cannot commit to.
- The music: I am not a big fan of some of the music especially the sound of water flowing. The sound makes me thirsty or have to us the restroom.
- Meditation is not my cup of tea: I think waaaaay too much and lack the ability to concentrate on nothingness for a long period of time. As soon as I open my eyes I start people watching, thinking about what I should eat for dinner, and figuring out what I need to do the next day.
- The show offs: I hate when I end up being next to the person who has done yoga forever or is super flexible. Not only is his toe touching his head, but also he’s doing it without breaking a sweat as I shake like a Polaroid picture.
- The breathing: How deep of a breath do I have to take to match the instructor’s tempo? Inhale………………Exhale as I almost pass out.
- The pace is too slow: Instead of relaxing, I’m trying to find out when we can move to the next pose.
- It’s boring: Because of the slow pace, I get bored midway.
- The soft, gentle, metaphorical way the instructor speaks: Half the time I can barely hear the instructor. And the other half I’m rolling my eyes- let the stresses of the day flow out of your fingertips and toes- Shoot I’m stressed out trying to hold this pose. To be completely honest, the instructor’s voice reminds me of a pedophile trying to lure in a child. I want to scream say no to the cookies Johnny and run for your life!!
- I’m just not that into it: If Yoga was something I truly enjoyed the things above would not bother me so much. And for this reason, I hate yoga.
No comments:
Post a Comment